On my journey to find Inner peace – I was recently in a situation where the actions of a person where confusing, hurtful, and frustrating for me. I spent so much time judging, being sad that he wasn’t acting in a way that I expected, being hard on myself, and wondering what I might have done to make him act this way. I have to interject that these are all behaviors that I know will only cause me more suffering, but I do believe that trying situations are always tests to see just how much we’ve learned on our paths in life.
I was working really, really hard to forgive him and for some reason I was having difficulty getting to a place of peace. It wasn’t until a few weeks ago, when a life lesson changed everything: Accept people where they are. This concept shifted me out of a judging, ego mindset, and back into a loving, compassionate place. I immediately felt like I was viewing him for the first time, and could see that he was simply doing the best he could in that moment. The charge was gone, and now I feel released from the mental anguish I was putting myself through over it. What a relief.
I then began to realize that incorporating this principle- Accept people where they are, with every person we come in contact with would create so much more understanding and compassion in this world.
Acceptance of where other people are means ditching judgment and expectations of how you think people should act. It also means releasing the inferiority complexes we pick up at times when we feel more evolved spiritually, mentally, and emotionally. The truth is we will never fully know what is going on in someone else’s life. We don’t know the full truth and all their stories. Though at many times, we try to write our own versions of their stories to suit our ego’s best interest.
What we do know is that we are all just doing the best we can with the circumstances. We’ve all been given very different lots in life, and so the way in which we handle what life throws us will be different. The major key here is that it is not our job to judge others for how they handle life, it isn’t even our job to try and change people to make them “better” or more tolerable. Our job is to consistently live in our own light, love, and truth.
When we accept others as they are, we give them the space to find their own path and to learn their own truth. As we accept and love others as they are, does not mean that we have to participate in their stories or mentalities. With acceptance and compassion, come healthy boundaries.
If you’re struggling in a relationship or situation with another person, try switching your mindset to allow them to just be where there are on their path in this moment. Don’t try to change them, don’t allow yourself to get wrapped up in their story. Simply accept. Notice what happens, and let me know in the comments!